In the months after starting all over again, while I was
putting one foot in front of the other, I read lots and lots of books. I have two daughters and the thought of them
growing up in this world terrifies me. There
are two books that are essential reading for my girls before they reach adulthood
and make their way into the world. The first book is by a woman called Patricia
Craven. Pat worked as a probation
officer and listened to the stories of hundreds of men who had abused their partners. She came to recognise and understand their
behaviours and beliefs and she developed The Freedom Programme and wrote the book
Living with the Dominator. It was Pat’s
work that made me see that I was in an abusive relationship. In fact it appeared that she personally knew
my abuser, such was the accuracy of her description of The Dominator. I read
this book in one morning, and the clarity that it afforded me, about not only
the abusive relationship, but the world that we live in and society’s role in
perpetuating abuse was astounding. I can honestly say that I have never learned
so much from just one book.
The second book that I want my girls to read is called How
to be a Woman by Caitlin Moran. I
started to read my sister’s copy and couldn't put it down, I hadn't realised
that I was a feminist until I read this book and identified strongly with it. It opened my eyes once again to the
inequalities of today’s world. I had
grown accustomed to the sexism, the misogyny, the objectification of women and
I think that I almost couldn't see the wood for the trees, so to speak. Again it was a real eye opener and it made me
laugh- a lot! I awoke from my feminism
apathy, ready to do whatever it takes to teach my girls about feminism and
sexism and instill in them a desire for equality. So far so good, my ten year old now has a
keen eye for a gender stereotype! My heart swells with pride.
I feel that we are on the verge of a revolution . Feminism
is a hot topic and rightly so. Campaigns
such as Lose the Lads’ Mags and No More Page 3 are gathering pace. Women are not objects. Women do not exist for male sexual
gratification. These beliefs and the media machine that feeds them are part of
the problem, part of the reason why some men believe that women are worth less
than men, that women are less intelligent than men, that men have the right to
control women’s bodies. These beliefs
help The Dominator justify his behaviour.
Let’s keep challenging them! (I’m
not even going to start on the body image/self esteem issue! )
LINKS
The Freedom Programme http://www.freedomprogramme.co.uk/lwd.php
How to be a Woman http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/0091940737
Lose the Lads’ Mags http://www.losetheladsmags.org.uk/
No More Page 3 http://nomorepage3.org/
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